So is this the start of something beautiful? Sorry to disappoint you but for some reason I just know it isn’t. I had a great time, it really made the weekend and I’ve been smiling all the way home but I’m not daydreaming about the future. This is fairly abnormal for the average girl, usually a holiday romance would lead to visuals of a white wedding with the grooms speech telling the unlikely circumstances of our meeting. Well not this time. I just don’t have the expected urge to re-unite.
HS texts and e-mails often over the next week. The attention is nice and I like chatting to him in any shape or form. CF is still in the background and hassling to see me since I’ve got back but having someone genuinely interested in my conversation and not just game playing to get a quick shag is refreshing. I’m enjoying the banter so much I’m beginning to wonder why I didn’t think there was a future in it. He hasn’t asked to meet yet but we’re only an hours drive/train ride apart.
I’m starting to have the visuals now, not the psycho wedding ones but romantic weekend in London ones. HS lives in the big smoke and I can just imagine him taking me round all the sites and showing me great little bars us country girls would never find on our own. It would be great, all lovely walks along the south bank and long lay ins after late nights out. So I suggest it.
It appears that’s probably not the best plan….as he coughs up he has a girlfriend. I should have known. I can’t say I’m hugely surprised, I didn’t ask and he didn’t tell me. It’s not like anyone lied and in theory it was perfectly reasonable of me to assume he was single. If I’m really honest though….I thought as much. Which is probably why I didn’t ask, because I didn’t want to know. This also explains why he wasn’t as forthcoming as I’d expected when we first hooked up.
I feel terrible now, he’s started pouring out all his relationship troubles to me in a heartfelt e-mail and I’m actually giving him relationship advice. It’s so totally wrong for the woman a guy had a fling with to be dishing out tips on how to sort things out with his girlfriend but I sort of feel I need to try and help as I’m now part of the problem. I’ve point blank told him I’m not going to see him again as friends or otherwise but that he can call or e-mail me if he needs to talk (why did I do that??) Now he’s sending me long e-mails about 3 times a day as if I’m his therapist! This hasn’t helped with my faith in men either seeing as he seemed such a nice down to earth bloke. I can actually see why he’s done it though, he’s really not the nasty conniving type, it’s just him and the missus have got into a rut where he’s been lazy and she’s constantly moaning. The sex has dried up between them as there’s more of a battle of wills than any kind of excitement going on so a holiday fling with someone who’s a bit of a laugh probably seemed just the ticket.
I feel terrible. What if I was her??
Dani
Friday, 30 October 2009
Friday, 23 October 2009
Blog 18 - Great Ski Weekend...Not much Skiing!
The fact I got to ski school on time the following morning was nothing short of a miracle. We were out until all hours partying with the stockbrokers and when HS walked me back to the apartment I’m sure our farewell’s took at least an hour. I felt pretty special that morning but it’s amazing how the fresh air, Italian coffee, lunchtime drinks and a hot shower revived us enough to go out again that night.
HS and I had been texting a lot that day anyway so it was no co-incidence when he walked into ‘Bar Roma’ where we were drinking with his mate Tom. He’d shaken off the rest of the crowd for the night and my lot were off home for an early night knowing that Jane and I would stay out with these guys.
We had a much quieter but still very entertaining evening drinking wine, playing cards and having a really good laugh. Jane and Tom were getting on like a house on fire which left us plenty of time for private conversation, not that it needed to be quiet but you know what it’s like when you’re getting to know someone. Jane is one of those amazing girls who can find something in common with everyone…genuinely, and when it comes to being a pulling sidekick she’s ideal. She’ll merrily make the most of a situation but won’t take it too seriously either.
When the guys walked us home it wasn’t too late and we weren’t too sloshed. I was starry eyed and liking HS more and more by the minute. He didn’t even ask me to go back to his hotel so it felt like we were building something quite genuine. Don’t get me wrong, I hadn’t lost my mojo…..I just wanted to hang it out til the last night!
Our last day skiing was brilliant, the whole team were in such a good mood and it was one of those rare days when the sun was hot but the snow was still powdery. We had a long laughter filled lunch outside and then spent the rest of the afternoon playing ski tag on some little red runs through trees.
Our last night of partying was no let down either. We had a rowdy, drinking game filled sing song after dinner in the same bar as all the stock brokers. HS and I kept on winking at each other and sneaking off for a quick snog but it was important for us to both spend time with our teams on the last night. When they each started trailing off through either drunkenness or tiredness I went and grabbed his hand and said we should go. We walked back to his hotel through the snow holding hands and giggling.
It was a very fun and very passionate night. After very little sleep and giggling goodbyes in the morning I ran back to the apartment I was sharing with Jane to find her with hat and coat on saying the mini-bus was here to take us to the airport! After speed packing and a mouthful of coffee I jumped on the bus to high fives and cheers…They wouldn’t expect any less from me.
HS and I had been texting a lot that day anyway so it was no co-incidence when he walked into ‘Bar Roma’ where we were drinking with his mate Tom. He’d shaken off the rest of the crowd for the night and my lot were off home for an early night knowing that Jane and I would stay out with these guys.
We had a much quieter but still very entertaining evening drinking wine, playing cards and having a really good laugh. Jane and Tom were getting on like a house on fire which left us plenty of time for private conversation, not that it needed to be quiet but you know what it’s like when you’re getting to know someone. Jane is one of those amazing girls who can find something in common with everyone…genuinely, and when it comes to being a pulling sidekick she’s ideal. She’ll merrily make the most of a situation but won’t take it too seriously either.
When the guys walked us home it wasn’t too late and we weren’t too sloshed. I was starry eyed and liking HS more and more by the minute. He didn’t even ask me to go back to his hotel so it felt like we were building something quite genuine. Don’t get me wrong, I hadn’t lost my mojo…..I just wanted to hang it out til the last night!
Our last day skiing was brilliant, the whole team were in such a good mood and it was one of those rare days when the sun was hot but the snow was still powdery. We had a long laughter filled lunch outside and then spent the rest of the afternoon playing ski tag on some little red runs through trees.
Our last night of partying was no let down either. We had a rowdy, drinking game filled sing song after dinner in the same bar as all the stock brokers. HS and I kept on winking at each other and sneaking off for a quick snog but it was important for us to both spend time with our teams on the last night. When they each started trailing off through either drunkenness or tiredness I went and grabbed his hand and said we should go. We walked back to his hotel through the snow holding hands and giggling.
It was a very fun and very passionate night. After very little sleep and giggling goodbyes in the morning I ran back to the apartment I was sharing with Jane to find her with hat and coat on saying the mini-bus was here to take us to the airport! After speed packing and a mouthful of coffee I jumped on the bus to high fives and cheers…They wouldn’t expect any less from me.
Friday, 9 October 2009
Blog 17 – Time to get away and out of the spotlight.
Lucky for me Mick seemed to actually expect that the event was just a one off. It was like I was crush he’d had for years and now he’d realised the dream he was as happy as a sand boy! I’ve been wiping my brow in relief as I was dreading upsetting Roomy by having this fling with her mate and then having to find a way of tactfully giving him the brush off!
CF arrived home from Aus and when he invited me round to look at his photo’s I did just that. Never mind that I could have just seen them on Facebook. I just can’t defend myself any longer, I am inexplicably attached to a man who is no good for me and gives me very little of what I want or need. I’m well aware of this which is why I don’t treat the ‘situation’ with any respect and keep searching for something better. Familiarity is so nice sometimes though, but I realised the right sentiments weren’t behind it when he fell asleep straight afterwards and didn’t even hear me leaving. I just didn’t feel comfortable falling asleep there too, says a lot really.
Getting into all this strife is so exhausting, I’m definitely ready for a break and the company ski trip couldn’t arrive a minute too soon. There are only six of us in the business and our boss wants us to have fun so it's unlikely there'll be any boring meetings, it really is just a jolly! We are all feeling pretty jammy and in high spirits on the way to the Alps and I personally have really been looking forward to a change of scenery. My skiing is pretty terrible so I can’t wait to brush up on my skills, breath in some fresh mountain air and have a laugh with my work mates.
We are staying in this gorgeous tiny resort in Italy, it’s all very stylish and no rowdy groups anywhere which suits us fine. On the first evening we are all chilling in this lovely bar after dinner. Jane (another singleton) and I are looking around agreeing there’ll be no mischief on the menu this weekend….Until right on cue the doors of swing open and a huge group of guys walk in. They all look between 25 and 40, are well dressed, many are very attractive specimens and I can hear that they’re English. Bingo.
So this is the deal; our ‘manor from heaven’ are stockbrokers on a corporate trip. The rest of the team are shaking their heads in amusement as Jane and I get up and walk to the bar without even saying a word. Queuing at the bar is a great advantage point to cruise the joint from and we identify our targets within about 3 minutes. There’s usually a group within a group if you look carefully and this gang of half a dozen late twenty to early thirty somethings’ suited us down to the ground. Stockbrokers are known to be a sociable bunch so it wasn’t difficult to start the banter.
They turn out to be a great bunch, and don’t even remotely fit the sexist macho stereotype that might be associated with that profession. My attention was on someone quite specific from the moment the crowd walked in however. It was a combination of things that attracted me; his height (6’4”), his t-shirt was my favourite colour (green), his eyes sparkled and his smile shone. I can’t say that he was shy but he wasn’t as forthcoming as I expected him to be after we’d spent some time having a laugh and getting to know each other. At some point in the evening he just seemed to loosen up though, it was like he’d decided he was just going to go with the flow. I don’t think it was the alcohol lubrication but I wouldn’t rule it out!
After that point we separated off into a corner of the bar with Jane and a guy she’d been chatting up all night. We had such a good time, it was snowing outside and we were in one of those warm, laughter filled bubbles of an evening. Jane and I decided we needed to ship out at about 3am because we had ski school booked for 9!!! Whilst snogging to keep warm outside in the cold my handsome stockbroker (HS from now on) tried to persuade me to go back to his hotel room but as much as I was tempted I wanted to see where this would go….and having a one night stand probably wouldn’t take it very far....
CF arrived home from Aus and when he invited me round to look at his photo’s I did just that. Never mind that I could have just seen them on Facebook. I just can’t defend myself any longer, I am inexplicably attached to a man who is no good for me and gives me very little of what I want or need. I’m well aware of this which is why I don’t treat the ‘situation’ with any respect and keep searching for something better. Familiarity is so nice sometimes though, but I realised the right sentiments weren’t behind it when he fell asleep straight afterwards and didn’t even hear me leaving. I just didn’t feel comfortable falling asleep there too, says a lot really.
Getting into all this strife is so exhausting, I’m definitely ready for a break and the company ski trip couldn’t arrive a minute too soon. There are only six of us in the business and our boss wants us to have fun so it's unlikely there'll be any boring meetings, it really is just a jolly! We are all feeling pretty jammy and in high spirits on the way to the Alps and I personally have really been looking forward to a change of scenery. My skiing is pretty terrible so I can’t wait to brush up on my skills, breath in some fresh mountain air and have a laugh with my work mates.
We are staying in this gorgeous tiny resort in Italy, it’s all very stylish and no rowdy groups anywhere which suits us fine. On the first evening we are all chilling in this lovely bar after dinner. Jane (another singleton) and I are looking around agreeing there’ll be no mischief on the menu this weekend….Until right on cue the doors of swing open and a huge group of guys walk in. They all look between 25 and 40, are well dressed, many are very attractive specimens and I can hear that they’re English. Bingo.
So this is the deal; our ‘manor from heaven’ are stockbrokers on a corporate trip. The rest of the team are shaking their heads in amusement as Jane and I get up and walk to the bar without even saying a word. Queuing at the bar is a great advantage point to cruise the joint from and we identify our targets within about 3 minutes. There’s usually a group within a group if you look carefully and this gang of half a dozen late twenty to early thirty somethings’ suited us down to the ground. Stockbrokers are known to be a sociable bunch so it wasn’t difficult to start the banter.
They turn out to be a great bunch, and don’t even remotely fit the sexist macho stereotype that might be associated with that profession. My attention was on someone quite specific from the moment the crowd walked in however. It was a combination of things that attracted me; his height (6’4”), his t-shirt was my favourite colour (green), his eyes sparkled and his smile shone. I can’t say that he was shy but he wasn’t as forthcoming as I expected him to be after we’d spent some time having a laugh and getting to know each other. At some point in the evening he just seemed to loosen up though, it was like he’d decided he was just going to go with the flow. I don’t think it was the alcohol lubrication but I wouldn’t rule it out!
After that point we separated off into a corner of the bar with Jane and a guy she’d been chatting up all night. We had such a good time, it was snowing outside and we were in one of those warm, laughter filled bubbles of an evening. Jane and I decided we needed to ship out at about 3am because we had ski school booked for 9!!! Whilst snogging to keep warm outside in the cold my handsome stockbroker (HS from now on) tried to persuade me to go back to his hotel room but as much as I was tempted I wanted to see where this would go….and having a one night stand probably wouldn’t take it very far....
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
